That uppity popinjay Kim Jong-Il has been throwing his weight around of late. This vexes Voltan. Just because he has a whole country, whereas Voltan only has Super Secret Sea-Base Beta, he thinks he's already halfway there. But it is a crappy country. Everyone knows that. If Mr Kim believes he can achieve world domination before Voltan, he shall have another think coming.
Apparently Kimg Jon-Il's birth, to Kim Jong-Suk, was foretold by a swallow. However, suck and swallow do not a birth make. Voltan smells a rat. Ha ha ha. Perhaps the rat had something to do with it. Ha ha ha.
Bah! Enough of this. Voltan is not scared of Kim's bargain-basement nukes. Voltan shall unleash substance 3xb upon North Korea. Just as soon as Voltan has discovered it.
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Plead for mercy
Should you wish your life to continue largely unchanged when Voltan is lord and ruler of all, you may submit a plea for mercy at the following address.
mr.voltan [at] googlemail.com
Your plea shall most likely be ignored. Book deals also accepted.
What are Voltan prime concerns?
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2006
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October
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- Day 342: Is this goodbye?
- Day 336: Activity at last
- Day 335: Hot
- Day 332: Increasing handicap
- Day 331: Who shall bring forth deliverance?
- Day 330: Underachieving
- Day 329: Control
- Day 328: Zap, a return
- Day 325, later: Fun
- Day 325: Voltan makes the world go around
- Day 324: Welcome to Voltan's network
- Day 323: Ham-fisted radio
- Day 322: Il communication
- Day 321: Frisky
- Day 318: Jazz hands!
- Day 317: Remedy
- Day 316: On a small vessel
- Day 315: Plan for a slave army
- Day 314: Font fatwa... a fontwa
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October
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Suspicious characters
Voltan keeps an eye on those who may cause trouble when Voltan is lord and ruler of all.
Here is the list of those Voltan has under surveillance:
About This Evilscope Transmission
- Voltan
- There is nothing you need to know about this Evilscope transmission. Stop asking questions. If you don't try any funny business then you won't get hurt. Until later.
2 comments:
Kim is a rubbish evil dictator. You'd take him in a straight fight any day of the week, oh great one. I would be priveleged if I could hold your cape whilst you pummel his podgy face into the dirt. But then, I fear I would not be worthy.
This is where I apply for the job of chief toady, isn't it?
I, Bummero, find Kim Jong-Il bizarre; How can such a nerdy (though I know many cool nerds whom I am slandering deeply with this comparison) looking dictator wield so much power?
I cannot fathom it.
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