Voltan has learnt that there are many spiders on the mainland at the moment. This is a result of favourable climactic conditions over the previous twelve months.
Voltan wonders whether it is possible to reconfigure the Evilscope to transmit on a frequency they can hear. The arachnid legions are currently sowing fear in a most inefficient manner. With Voltan's co-ordination and guidance they could cause terror and panic in the cities of the world. Moreover, they could entangle military and law-enforcement targets in their webs. Then conditions would be ripe for Voltan's sweep to power.
Voltan can picture them now scuttling majestically along major thoroughfares and sweeping across the facades of national monuments. There shall be no glass large enough to cover them, no card powerful enough to slide under them! They shall conquer all for Voltan!
This pleases Voltan.
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Plead for mercy
Should you wish your life to continue largely unchanged when Voltan is lord and ruler of all, you may submit a plea for mercy at the following address.
mr.voltan [at] googlemail.com
Your plea shall most likely be ignored. Book deals also accepted.
What are Voltan prime concerns?
Blog Archive
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2006
(48)
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September
(26)
- Day 311: Loose lips
- Day 310: Fog fug
- Day 309: Zap!
- Day 308: The best money Voltan ever spent
- Day 307: Another list of the superlativest items ever
- Day 304: Down with the kids
- Day 303: Stool
- Day 302: Spidergeddon
- Day 301: A set-to
- Day 300, later: Electoral update
- Day 300: Voltan dares to dream
- Day 297: Evilscope
- Day 296: Bonfire of the profanities
- Day 295, later: A meeting with Miss Billingbrox
- Day 295: Divide and rule
- Day 294: Home shopping the evil way
- Day 293: Voltanistan
- Day 291: Spitting
- Day 290, later: Becalmed
- Day 290: Sing praise to the glory of Voltan
- Day 289: Interloper!
- Day 288: Defeating Voltan's arch-nemesis
- Day 287: The mess must go
- Day 286: Chewing gum
- Day 285: Voltan shall make the trains run on time
- Day 283: Power to Voltan!
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September
(26)
Suspicious characters
Voltan keeps an eye on those who may cause trouble when Voltan is lord and ruler of all.
Here is the list of those Voltan has under surveillance:
About This Evilscope Transmission
- Voltan
- There is nothing you need to know about this Evilscope transmission. Stop asking questions. If you don't try any funny business then you won't get hurt. Until later.
2 comments:
Haven't you seen 'Arachnophobia'? There's no spider in the world that a good flame-thrower can't handle.
So it's you then is it? I've not seen him again so I think he's not hearing the Evilscope.
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